CASH IS KING!

"Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras" (jegoingout)
10/04/2016 at 18:24 • Filed to: Work

Me: Hey (name redacted), my man. How are you?

Him: good good. Yourself?

Me: I’m doing good, thanks for asking. I wanted to call you to talk about that Audi A8.

Him: oh yeah yeah..yeah yeah. I never checked out that other one, you talked me outta that. Lemme ask you, how can I buy this and leave no paper trail?

Me: Well uh...we discussed the price at $34,500, you’re looking to be at 37k and change all in.

Him: yeah yeah yeah. How can I leave no trail?

Me: Well cash...

Him: Okay. Give me a call Friday. If I’m still feeling it, I’ll come down and buy it. I’m sure there isn’t a lot of paperwork to do if I do cash

Me: Yeah there isn’t excluding insurance and such.

Him: *laughs* yeah man. Ill catch you friday.

DISCUSSION (44)

Vicente Esteve > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:30

For some reason my grandfather also bought everything he could in cash.

LongbowMkII > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:30

Seems legit.

Bring your counterfeit pen.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:33

Eh, I’m pretty sure that you have to declare more that $10000 sale, so there will be a paper trail.

Edit: Yeah, there will be a paper trail.

http://blog.fraudfighter.com/bid/80625/Bank-Secrecy-Act-The-10-000-Rule

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > LongbowMkII
10/04/2016 at 18:36

TOO LEGIT!

Spaceball-Two > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:36

Jokes on him. When your dealer goes and deposits the cash they will have to fill out a CTR and the bank will file a SAR. Unless your manager out and out lies to his bank (which he probably won’t because they retain his flooring line) there most definitely will be a paper trail.

DynamicWeight > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:38

No trail? Like not register it? Sure thing.

E90M3 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:41

My dad wrote a check for his 135is and they still did a credit check, he wasn’t too thrilled about having to wait while they did that.

Your boy, BJR > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:42

Lol so ain’t telling him about the IRS investigation I see

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Vicente Esteve
10/04/2016 at 18:44

Same.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:50

Too Legit to Quit!

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 18:50

This guy should just buy off craigslist.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > E90M3
10/04/2016 at 18:52

That’s pretty dumb. Me: I have all the money. Dealer: We want to make sure that you can afford the loan you are not getting. Me: but I have all the money?

E90M3 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
10/04/2016 at 18:53

I was pretty perplexed as well.

Nick Has an Exocet > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts.
10/04/2016 at 18:58

The current penalty is $100 per incident of failure to file. Most speeding tickets are more than that.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 19:00

Drive Auto Center wouldnt even take my cash. They explained what a PITA it is to document that cash.

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
10/04/2016 at 19:02

Exactly. When I managed their line it was huge endeavor to balance their books with new loans and incoming cash. They’d rather you just make a few payments or paydown the principal.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Nick Has an Exocet
10/04/2016 at 19:05

Well the bank also has to submit a form to the IRS and could face criminal charges if they don’t so they’ll probably report you. I doubt you want to be investigated for money laundering as this is what it’s supposed to counteract.

haveacarortwoorthree2 > E90M3
10/04/2016 at 19:09

Sounds stupid, but they probably just didn’t want to make sure there weren’t any red flags. If his credit score was 420, a check for a 135is might have issues. That, or it was a stupid policy liking a pub id’ing everyone, including my grandfather.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 19:12

They probably don’t get a lot of “buy the damn car” buyers like me.

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
10/04/2016 at 19:21

Yeah. It’s a tough business. I know those guys don’t pull in huge salaries and car sales, depending upon the economy can ruin you mentally and financially. When the downturn hit there were times I’d step up for them when the CEO of the bank wanted them to close up shop. But they’ve held on. It helps selling reliable rigs like 4runners and Pilots.

Rico > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 19:21

That’s IF he deposits the cash!

Rico > haveacarortwoorthree2
10/04/2016 at 19:26

How incredibly stupid is that. Like I understand they don’t want anyone to claim they were singled out if they do it to everybody but it’s dumb to witness.

That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 19:27

Any cash transaction over $10k is going to leave a trail. My guess is he’s trying to keep it out of a divorce.

Spaceball-Two > Rico
10/04/2016 at 19:28

Why wouldn’t he? What use is a boat load of cash just sitting around. You’re not earning interest and you’re not paying down your line of credit. Even if he goes to auction and buys new cars there is still a record of that money being used. Also the bank holds the title on the A8, they won’t release it without it being paid off the line.

Unless he buys shit ton of hookers and blow. Which if that’s the case. RIGHT ON!

petebmwm > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 19:51

yeah, your f&i guy should have an irs form for him....

petebmwm > E90M3
10/04/2016 at 19:53

ofac report, and alot of times to see if they can get a rate low enough to convice you to finance and pick up the flat.

Nick Has an Exocet > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts.
10/04/2016 at 19:54

Yeah, I was just pointing out the absurdly low fine ;)

petebmwm > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 19:55

any sales / service job will ruin you. you just cant take any of it personal..

Rico > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 19:57

True the money is not going to any ‘on the books’ means but there are tons of ways to use cash that isn’t tracked. Hell some people live their entire lives that way lol. I’m not saying the 37k at once though.

Spaceball-Two > petebmwm
10/04/2016 at 19:58

Agreed. I’ve seen a lot of really nice people get dragged down because it was just too much to handle.

Spaceball-Two > Rico
10/04/2016 at 19:59

Oh yeah. When an underwriter or auditor is going over your books every year they’re going to want to know where and the white Audi went. HA HA

Rico > Spaceball-Two
10/04/2016 at 20:00

What Audi? *shreds all records of it*

petebmwm > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/04/2016 at 20:01

it can be done with no paper trail, for the full ammount in cash.. just a man buying a car.

E90M3 > petebmwm
10/04/2016 at 20:17

Ah, that makes sense.

Vicente Esteve > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/04/2016 at 21:20

Once he got mad at the Ford dealership because they were’t willing to take cash for a new Grand Marquis.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Vicente Esteve
10/04/2016 at 21:23

I can’t think of any dealer here that would refuse cash. They might not make as much money off of it as they do off of financing but I doubt they’d straight up refuse it.

Vicente Esteve > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/04/2016 at 21:29

They didn’t refuse it, but when handed the bills they were extremely confused. Then told him if it wouldn’t be a problem to just transfer it to a bank account. He said no.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Vicente Esteve
10/04/2016 at 21:31

Oh, you mean like PHYSICAL CASH. No, nobody I know has ever done that. I just meant my grandpa transfers the money/wrights a check for the whole amount when he picks up the car. He doesn’t actually walk in with a suitcase full of money, though that would be cooler.

Vicente Esteve > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/04/2016 at 21:56

Physical cash yeah. He didn’t use a suitcase, he just put it in a small leather bag (I swear he wasn’t involved in crime).

It sort of trascended to my father, he somehow doesn’t believe in payments. All our cars have been payed outright.

FSI - alcohol enthusiast with a car problem > Vicente Esteve
10/05/2016 at 00:31

My grandfather did the same to buy his BMW back then, he paid for his car with 38k Deutsch Mark in bills. Crazy

Tapas > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
10/05/2016 at 07:36

Damn.

Bring your counterfeit Audi, just in case he brings counterfeit cash.

Vicente Esteve > FSI - alcohol enthusiast with a car problem
10/05/2016 at 07:41

The important thing is how you get the money to the dealership. Briefcase? Pockets? Paper bag?

FSI - alcohol enthusiast with a car problem > Vicente Esteve
10/05/2016 at 08:25

Believe it or not my grandfather used a plastic bag...

When we sold our BMW the buyer had €2,000 in his wallet and handed that out to us, it wasn’t even in an envelope. It was in our driveway anyways but carrying that much cash with me makes me feel uncomfortable.

Arrivederci > Spaceball-Two
10/05/2016 at 08:58

Depends - if his business conducts a lot of cash business, they can file for an exemption from regularly processing CTRs. When I was a commercial teller many moons ago, I had a couple businesses that didn’t require them.

My CTR memory is also vague-ish, but I don’t recall the business having to report who specifically gave them the cash, though if Uncle Sam was worried enough, I’m sure they could use the CTR to investigate the business, which would then turn on the guy buying the car.